About Questions for My Jewish Friend
A Window Into Orthodox Jewish Life
“I’m not sure; I need to ask my Jewish friend.” This is something that, while not said to me, has been said about me my entire life. I grew up as an observant (although not Orthodox) Jew, and unlike many other Orthodox Jews, I went to public school my whole life. My best friends growing up were Catholic, more Catholic, and Southern Baptist, and in college, I continued to have friends from all sorts of backgrounds. Because of this, I’ve become accustomed to explaining the many laws and traditions that make up my Jewish life to friends who otherwise wouldn’t know much about Judaism.
Judaism has a rich history of traditions, writings, laws, and so on, but as an outsider looking in, I bet they look pretty wacky, not to mention confusing or hard to understand. This website is my attempt to welcome you into my world, just as I’ve welcomed my non-Jewish friends over the years. My hope is to answer any questions you might have about Orthodox Jewish life, if only there were a friend you could ask! Xenophobia is the fear of the foreign; by making my life a bit less foreign, I hope to help make the world more tolerant, one click at a time.
About Me
My name is Melody, and I, along with my husband and three beautiful children live in Chicago, although I hail from Pittsburgh, Pennsylvania. We are a proud Hoosier household, no matter how far away from Indiana University we may be, and I’m a devoted lover of Starbucks, art projects, and baking.
I would define myself as “Modern Orthodox” (although if you don’t know what the means, don’t worry; you’re in the right place). More or less, that puts me in the Orthodox Jewish world, but at the most liberal end of it. I’m by no means a scholar of Judaism or Jewish life, but as someone who lives and breathes it every day, I feel qualified to teach you about the basics. What you see here is my best attempt to do just that. If there’s a question I can’t answer, I’ll try to ask someone who can.
About What You’ll See Here
In keeping with the spirit of Questions for My Jewish Friend, you’ll notice that the style in which I present ideas and experiences here is personal and informal. Just as I’ve had countless conversations with friends, sitting on my couch or in a coffee shop, sharing and explaining what life is like as an Orthodox Jew, this website is an attempt to capture that experience, even if you don’t have that friend to sit with and ask your questions to.
I’m not going to be citing sources, and while I will be giving you an authentic perspective on Orthodox Judaism, I’ll be giving you my perspective (with all of its biases). I know lots and lots about Judaism (clearly… I made this website), but again, this is what I know from my experience of living it. If you have questions about specific things I say or claim, have heard things to the contrary, or are interested in seeing sources for specific things, feel free to contact me, and I would love to get back to you with whatever you’re looking for.
My Inspiration
Back in 2015, I found myself talking to a new friend who didn’t really know any other Jews. She had lots of questions, and I was thrilled to answer them. Sometimes people are shy to ask, but then how’s anyone supposed to learn anything about each other! I’m always happy to be grilled!
Anyway, I was explaining that there’s a Jewish idea that G-d (I’ll explain later why I don’t type the “o” in the middle) has a purpose for every person in the world. She asked what my purpose was. That’s a hard question, and it gave me pause. My knee-jerk answer was that, for most of my life, I’ve been explaining Judaism to my non-Jewish friends just like I was doing with her. Perhaps that’s my purpose (or one of them).
I really thought about this question after she left, though. One’s purpose(s) in the world is not necessarily knowable, but what do I think mine is? Is one of my purposes to help serve as a bridge from my community to others less familiar with my way of life? And if it is, how can I do a better job of that? And thus, Questions For My Jewish Friend was born. For all of the non-Jewish friends I have who are interested in learning about my life and practices, I can only imagine how many people are out there who would be interested in learning if they only had a Jewish friend to ask. Well, here I am! Welcome.
